Throughout a couple of lopsided interviews we were able to witness the wit of a professional versus the ignorance of a hick. But that "aperitif" was obviously not enough to satiate our hunger. We needed a debate to catch our Alaskan fish. The De"bait" adventure was the hook line and "stinker" needed to confirm this was a no contest. A real pro, Biden, facing Queen Crab. The crab was lost the moment she opened her mouth. 
(Queen Crab or Barracuda, same big mouth)
It is, nevertheless, worthy of a Broadway comedy. Here is my version:
"Ladies and gentlemen please welcome....blah, blah, blah."
(Applause). "Can I call you Joe?"
From now on all I am going to quote and satirized are the barrage of cliches by the Hockey Mom Joe 6-pack candidate.
1st question from the moderator:
What is your take on the Wall Street "Rescue Plan"? (or something like that)
" Golly Gee, Fannie and Fred...what a messy couple! They screw up and we have to bail them out! Let them sort their problems in their own intimacy rather than looking for a divorce. A marriage is a sacred union between a macho and his woman and God wants it that way. I do take issue. (wink)"
Interpretation of that statement by intelligent audience: ???????
2nd question:
What is your agenda on the economy?
" I took on those big oil companies in Alaska, Doggone it! Drill,baby drill!
(wink). Blah,blah,blah,blah,We are a team of Mavericks and will not allow drilling in Wasilla. I have lots of memorabilia there hanging on my walls above the fireplace. Those are my precious awards. They can drill anywhere else in the State. That's Maverick! The east coast politicians don't like us, blah, blah, blah. (wink, wink)
same audience: ???????
(Queen Crab or Barracuda, same big mouth)It is, nevertheless, worthy of a Broadway comedy. Here is my version:
"Ladies and gentlemen please welcome....blah, blah, blah."
(Applause). "Can I call you Joe?"
From now on all I am going to quote and satirized are the barrage of cliches by the Hockey Mom Joe 6-pack candidate.
1st question from the moderator:
What is your take on the Wall Street "Rescue Plan"? (or something like that)
" Golly Gee, Fannie and Fred...what a messy couple! They screw up and we have to bail them out! Let them sort their problems in their own intimacy rather than looking for a divorce. A marriage is a sacred union between a macho and his woman and God wants it that way. I do take issue. (wink)"
Interpretation of that statement by intelligent audience: ???????
2nd question:
What is your agenda on the economy?
" I took on those big oil companies in Alaska, Doggone it! Drill,baby drill!
(wink). Blah,blah,blah,blah,We are a team of Mavericks and will not allow drilling in Wasilla. I have lots of memorabilia there hanging on my walls above the fireplace. Those are my precious awards. They can drill anywhere else in the State. That's Maverick! The east coast politicians don't like us, blah, blah, blah. (wink, wink)
same audience: ???????
3rd question:
What would you take away from your campaign, if you had a choice?
Mavericks don't look back. We are the future. We are the reform. We cross the line and reach out to the enemy and convert them into mavericks. This country when we are in the White House will be a country of Mavericks! (triple wink)
4th question:
Do you agree with same sex joint ownership of property?
"I take issue" on that subject. Darn it! Not that I am against homos and lesbians, they have a right to express their own vices and sins...but, although tolerance is part of my virtues, I totally disagree with guaranteeing same rights to those perverts, but as I said, tolerance is the key word, doggonit. "We walk the walk not just talk the talk", blah, blah, blah,
(quadruple wink).
again the TV intelligent viewers: ??????
What would you take away from your campaign, if you had a choice?
Mavericks don't look back. We are the future. We are the reform. We cross the line and reach out to the enemy and convert them into mavericks. This country when we are in the White House will be a country of Mavericks! (triple wink)
4th question:
Do you agree with same sex joint ownership of property?
"I take issue" on that subject. Darn it! Not that I am against homos and lesbians, they have a right to express their own vices and sins...but, although tolerance is part of my virtues, I totally disagree with guaranteeing same rights to those perverts, but as I said, tolerance is the key word, doggonit. "We walk the walk not just talk the talk", blah, blah, blah,
(quadruple wink).
again the TV intelligent viewers: ??????
5th question:
What about the Iraq war and your position on foreign policy?
Hey, we are winning and we will not leave until we completely win. Mavericks, and you know that McCane* and I are a team of Mavericks, don't quit like you know who, those sissies from the Northeast. Give me Victory or give me Death, or you know, whatever Patrick Ewing* said. And John knows how to win a war, he is a real Maverick, Now, "here you you go again,Joe", "Say it ain't so Joe", your plan is "A white flag of surrender". "We walk the walk, not talk the talk", "Don't ask what your country can do for you...", "With great power comes great responsibility"
blah, blah, blah.
(double wink, pause, double wink)
What about the Iraq war and your position on foreign policy?
Hey, we are winning and we will not leave until we completely win. Mavericks, and you know that McCane* and I are a team of Mavericks, don't quit like you know who, those sissies from the Northeast. Give me Victory or give me Death, or you know, whatever Patrick Ewing* said. And John knows how to win a war, he is a real Maverick, Now, "here you you go again,Joe", "Say it ain't so Joe", your plan is "A white flag of surrender". "We walk the walk, not talk the talk", "Don't ask what your country can do for you...", "With great power comes great responsibility"
blah, blah, blah.
(double wink, pause, double wink)
reaction from viewers: ????????????
6th question:
Would you sit down to talk to our adversaries?
Yes, a maverick can talk to them sitting down or standing. No difference on that. I can take on anyone, as long as there is a pre-condition first which will have to consist on accepting anything we demand, and with the understanding that they have to destroy all their weapons first, "nukular" or otherwise, and that they all convert to Evangelicals. Once those conditions are met I, with my running mate McPain, will be willing to accept their pleas and grant them our pardon. We can do that because we have an army of Mavericks ready to declare war to Iran, or China, or Russia, or North Vietnam, or Venezuela. We are not like those boys in Congress, who congratulate each other and pad themselves on the back. I am a Washington outsider, a reformer with results!
(triple wink followed by a grimace of pain from winking so much)
same reaction: ????????
7th question:
What is your description of the Vice president job?
When I get to the White House, the first thing I am going to do with McMaverick is to change the color. White is not a hockey mom, Joe six-pack color. We like strong colors, strong and foxy, like me. We are debating between purple and red or maybe a combination of both. I know that for changes to happen we need to give the vice presidency more powers. Take for instance Iraq, where Bin Laden and most of the AlQeida people are building "nukular" weapons, The Vice president needs more power to accompany the President and destroy them. We are Mavericks and can do the job as a team, the two us, doggone it! I bet ya!
(multiple winks, Morse style)
TV audience: ????????????
Blogger notes:
There were other questions but I was so engaged on her parrotical spellingbee totally wrong answers, and her gestures, winks, nudges, etc. that I tuned off for a while in order to appreciate the good things in life as a buffer or antidote.
Palin was cartoonish, true to herself thus looking like a fake, gimmicky, a recorded tape of cliches, reciting everything they penetrated in her diminutive brain. Doesn't she have a baby sitter for her poor sacrificed baby?
6th question:
Would you sit down to talk to our adversaries?
Yes, a maverick can talk to them sitting down or standing. No difference on that. I can take on anyone, as long as there is a pre-condition first which will have to consist on accepting anything we demand, and with the understanding that they have to destroy all their weapons first, "nukular" or otherwise, and that they all convert to Evangelicals. Once those conditions are met I, with my running mate McPain, will be willing to accept their pleas and grant them our pardon. We can do that because we have an army of Mavericks ready to declare war to Iran, or China, or Russia, or North Vietnam, or Venezuela. We are not like those boys in Congress, who congratulate each other and pad themselves on the back. I am a Washington outsider, a reformer with results!
(triple wink followed by a grimace of pain from winking so much)
same reaction: ????????
7th question:
What is your description of the Vice president job?
When I get to the White House, the first thing I am going to do with McMaverick is to change the color. White is not a hockey mom, Joe six-pack color. We like strong colors, strong and foxy, like me. We are debating between purple and red or maybe a combination of both. I know that for changes to happen we need to give the vice presidency more powers. Take for instance Iraq, where Bin Laden and most of the AlQeida people are building "nukular" weapons, The Vice president needs more power to accompany the President and destroy them. We are Mavericks and can do the job as a team, the two us, doggone it! I bet ya!
(multiple winks, Morse style)
TV audience: ????????????
Blogger notes:
There were other questions but I was so engaged on her parrotical spellingbee totally wrong answers, and her gestures, winks, nudges, etc. that I tuned off for a while in order to appreciate the good things in life as a buffer or antidote.
Palin was cartoonish, true to herself thus looking like a fake, gimmicky, a recorded tape of cliches, reciting everything they penetrated in her diminutive brain. Doesn't she have a baby sitter for her poor sacrificed baby?
When Biden chocked talking about his first wife and children's car accident, she didn't even show an iota of emotions. She showed us who she really was, a cold fish full of ambitions, ignorant and having the ride of her life in her own Disney World. She is a "Nukular" bomb ready to explode, who, if she keeps opening her mouth could , for our sake, implode instead.
I need to clarify to my Republican readers, that Patrick Ewing was a basketball player, and that I know how to spell McCain, in this instance McCANE as it relates sometimes to old age, and that all the wrong quotations by Hockey Mom Palin, whether she said them or not, fit her profile in this comedy.
And finally...PLEASE! Will someone tell these politicians from hell that the word is NUCLEAR, not NUKULAR!!!!
I need to clarify to my Republican readers, that Patrick Ewing was a basketball player, and that I know how to spell McCain, in this instance McCANE as it relates sometimes to old age, and that all the wrong quotations by Hockey Mom Palin, whether she said them or not, fit her profile in this comedy.
And finally...PLEASE! Will someone tell these politicians from hell that the word is NUCLEAR, not NUKULAR!!!!
1 comment:
McCain is a chump. And he looked like one at the debate too!
Post a Comment